The Day The World Went Weird

Last week i got a phone call that i missed from World Productions, remember me banging on about them. I sent Darkness Rising to them a few years ago, even have them linked on this site... anyway, i sent them Nowhere Land to a very nice lady by the name of Fenella, or Fen, anyway, misssed the phone call but got a message from her saying that she has just finished reading the draft i sent and although not for them she would very much like for me to give her a call back. So i did, the next day and after a lot of delays got in contact and had a very cool chat about the draft she had read, what was wrong with it (pace, some characters needed more development etc), stuff that i already knew about or had an inclining, cos i am never ever 100 % with the shit i put on paper. She also said what was right with it, dialogue! Something i have struggled with for years to get right, either it is too purple, to expositiony(?) or just arse, but here it seems i have nailed it, she said it was clever and witty and the strongest aspect of the script. Awesome. If you can write dialogue you can write anything. BAsically, because she was impressed with what i had sent, but it had its problems, pace etc, but also lacked focus, there were too many ideas buzzing about and it wasn't sure what it wanted to be. Which is my fault, obviously, but i was struggling with the PI/film noir angle, which i so desperatley wanted to start doing, but squeezing it into this show, this idea that i have had for years was a bad move. So, Jack aint a detective, noone thinks he is a detective, Jack is a writer, a pissed off writer now. Anyway, they want to see another draft and if liked then it will be passed onto producers. Jesus, it makes me excited just thinking about, but i don;t want to get ahead of myself. All this has done, and i must keep this in mind at all times is given me reason. It has reinstalled my faith. it has given me a confidence boost like nothing ever could, it has validated my work, told me that i am not shit, that i am worth a damn, to keep going because i am good, because with time, paitence and a lot of hard fucking graft, i can fucking do something with my dream. I have take the first stepping stone to the place i wish to be, and all the fear that i had about, all the pussy cry baby i'm scared bullshit is gone, i fucking want it now, i want it badder than ever! I haven't got a big head, at least i hope to fuck i haven't, i'm just pleased with myself, i feel stupid as usual, but i am proud and i know that is a sin, but i aint relgious anyway, but i feel confident in myself, i feel like life isn't a big stinking pile of shit, i feel i have given up smoking for a reason now (sounds bent i know), i feel like i am not gonna live a wasted life. i feel... i actually feel pretty good, but yesterday i felt like dogshit, so you can't have it all the time. But today i feel good about it, i feel good about the new draft, the new direction, the fact that someone in the industry has said you are worth a damn, i feel good dude, i feel good.

So basically i am writing a new draft. Have looked at the structure of the show and pretty much revamped that to something more satisfying, quicker paced and hopefully cooler. Time will tell, now i need tea!

CURRENT MOOD: Good
CURRENTLY LISTENING TO: FSOL
CURRENTLY WATCHING: Oz, Alias, Eureka, X Files, Veronica Mars 2 and Lost2
CURRENTLY READING: All Tomorrows Parties by Gibson dude, Civil War (fucking spidey and Iron Man, go Cap!), Girls, 52, The Eternals (Gaiman is god), Spawn (getting more and more fucked up), and Powers when it fucking arrives!!!